Rant in My Pocket

Most of my workers would be improved if they would just obacerate themselves.

Quit that racket, you rabble-rousers!!!

I can hardly bear to hear myself think.

ficulnean -- adj.

Of fig-tree wood; worthless. (c. 1716)

A pure 98.5% of the papers in my office's file cabinets is ficulnean, which is why I went and got some groovy dynamite the other day.

Time to have some fun.

Yours truly,
Mr. Paul Freeman, CEO

I'm working late tying up loose ends and thought I'd add another vocabulary word for this week. Here you go, you rabble you. Get you some edumacation.

monticule - n. a small natural hill, little mount, elevation or prominence. Can be also a minor cone of a volcano. Synonyms: hillock, hummock, knoll, mound.

Example:
I'm going to go sit up on my favorite monticule and get me some howling done as soon as all this damn paperwork is cleared off my desk.

Which will be as soon as I can find my trash can. I think Ms. Couchon hid it when she left to make sure I got all this done.

Damn.

Whoever sent me that Bigfoot, I'm sending him back. Dammit, where are the Oompaloompas when I need them? Little buggers all ran away.

nugation, n. -- stupid remark, stupidity, silliness; unnecessary repetition in speech or writing.

Example: Further proliferation of nugation in staff meetings will be met with efficacious floggings.

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I expect a little more out of you folk than all that nattering on that goes on.

Perhaps if SOMEONE had remembered to bring some danishes this might have been a more successful meeting. Maybe next time we will have to hold our meeting in the ruins of the Danish Village.

Sweet, sweet village made of danishes!

Your pastry-laden patoot dances in front of my eyes...

I am torn between elation and dismay that I am the only blogger with an interest in briefcases , complexes , Shooters with Lenny , Oompaloompas, and Ape Law .

However, it was interesting to discover that I share an interest in Gokarts with Spiderman.

You never know about people, do you?

Boss of no one in the "interests" department, apparently,
Mr. Paul Freeman

This morning I feel a little.... fuzzy.

People keep talking about lint. I can hear it through the hole under my desk that leads into the Break Room.

One of these days the pieces will fall together and all of this will finally make sense!

The wya things have been going around here, I don't think I'll be getting any toerubs today.

Signed,
Sad, Lint-covered Boss

fallal - A useless piece of finery or frippery.

Example: Now you all know what "fallal" means, but some of you will probably have to look up "frippery."